How To Avoid Wedding Day Stress

Planning a wedding is not an easy task, it's serious business. Often most couples especially brides are so stressed out on their wedding day that they forget to enjoy the fun of being the centre of attention.

I attended an event where the bride who was supposed to be seated at the high table with the groom, left to scream at the servers because she got complaint that her in-laws were not being served. In fact, she almost started dishing the food in annoyance; it was an epic ‘bridezilla’ moment.

We all want our wedding day to be all we have ever dreamt and imagined it to be; you also have to remember that if it's not going as planned, you cannot let it get the best of you.

The week before your wedding is the last time to get it all right before your big day to avoid a big mess. You have to be 100% certain about every little detail especially if you are the perfectionist-kinda-bride.

To best way to avoid wedding stress is to  plan everything carefully and hand down responsibilities to competent people (either a wedding planner, a relative or friends) because you can’t do it all by yourself.

     



Photocredit: Google.com

 

Would you  like your wedding photos to look like this (stressed-out bride)?

                  When you could look like this (Happy Bride)

Here are some basic details to remember:

1. Confirm all appointments: Check with the professionals (makeover, photography, catering, tailors, wedding planner, hall designer, florist, band, etc.) that they are in touch with your wedding date. Send them reminders, give them exact directions and have their phone numbers to keep in touch.

2. Make Payment: Ensure that payment is made to the professionals in charge; this is so important. You don’t want to keep reminding yourself of what is owed to whom or constantly have thoughts of settling debts while you’re supposed to be enjoying your wedding.

3. Choose the Best Chief-Bridesmaid / Best Man: In recent times, people pick one of their siblings to fill this position, but often times these siblings are caught up in so much work, having to put up with meeting relatives’ needs as well as that of the bride. It’s advisable to pick someone who would have an undivided attention to meet your needs on your big day.

4. Check your Bridesmaid/Groomsmen and their transportation: Ensure you do not leave your bridesmaid and groomsmen stranded. Have a planned means of transportation for them to the wedding venue. You won’t want to walk down the aisle all by yourself or frowning because your bridal train is either incomplete or their outfits don’t match. Confirm their suits, dresses, hair styles, accessories, shoes etc. are in unison with what you want.

5. Take Extra Cash to the Wedding: Do not for any reason rely on the money that would come in form of gifts from your guests. Ensure you take extra cash for any miscellaneous or outstanding bills.

6. Appoint a Supervisor: In the case of the absence of a wedding planner, put a responsible relative in charge to supervise the whole ceremony so that everything goes as planned and in order.

7. Be Very Comfortable: Do yourself the favour of picking a comfortable dress or suit with very comfortable shoes. Heels work well on wedding gowns, but as soon as reception kicks off, change those heels into more comfortable shoes so that after the wedding your legs are still intact.

8. Don’t Starve Yourself: Start your wedding day with a healthy breakfast. Going through your big day hungry would get you cranky. You would need a lot of energy to socialize for hours and contain the whole excitement.

The most important thing above all this is to ‘ENJOY YOURSELF’; you definitely deserve to have as much fun as your guest.

Have you witnessed any 'bridezilla moments'? Please share

How to Plan a Bridal Shower....Naija Style

A bridal shower is one of the things we do for the love of a friend who is soon to be married. It is a chance to hang out and blend with the bride before she ties the knot.

For some brides, bridal shower comes as a surprise, while others are expectant. Whichever way it goes, ensure it’s one fun day that the bride will cherish and hold for a lifetime.





Here are some factors to consider when planning a bridal shower:

1.     Time: Getting old and new friends together under one roof without inconveniences is not so easy. So you need time to plan and bring people together early enough. Most people do this via bbm group chat or whats app group chat. It’s much easier and cheaper to bring people together using this social platform.

2.     Pick a Date: Ideally, the shower should be held a month before the wedding, but these days’ it doesn’t really matter as long as it is convenient. Since everyone’s schedule varies, it could be difficult to agree on a particular date. So try reaching a general consensus with everyone or vote to pick out the most convenient date. This will ensure that everyone that has to travel in for the event is given enough time to plan and prepare.

3.      Choose a Venue: A venue adds to the special effect of the shower. Whether you choose a friend’s house, a hall, a hotel, the beach, a getaway trip to Vegas, a yacht or even a fancy restaurant, ensure that it fits your budget.

4.     Share Responsibilities: If you are the coordinator, it doesn’t mean you have to take all the work upon yourself. Sharing responsibilities is key to the success of a bridal shower. Remember these responsibilities should not be imposed, everyone should be allowed to say or choose what they are comfortable helping out with.

5.     Budget/Money: this is a key factor in planning a bridal shower. It’s one thing to make fun plans; it’s another to make it affordable for everyone. You need to consider that all pockets are not the same. Make the bridal shower list as agreed with everyone; attach a price to each item, and split the total cost equally amongst yourselves.

6.     Pay on Time: Agree on a deadline for payment and have someone be in charge of the finances. That way, you can keep track of payment made and encourage others who haven’t paid to do so.

7.     Uniform Dressing (optional): uniformity in choice of clothes gives some form of uniqueness to the shower. Choose a colour and have everyone agree as the colour of the day, that way, the bride stands out.

8.     Accessories for the Bride: some people go all the way by getting head to toe costume for the bride, others use tiaras, crowns, bridal sash etc. This depends on your budget.

9.     MC: choose someone fun within the group/circle to host the event.

10. Have Fun: that’s the reason for the shower in the first place. Don’t turn it to a tension ground or a brawl day; settle your differences before or after the shower. Always remember to put the bride first, and that means making her happy.

Bridal Shower Checklist

Make plans for:

1.     Venue

2.     Decorations

3.     Food/Chops/Cake

4.     Drinks

5.     Accessories for the bride

6.     Music

7.     Gift for the Bride

8.  Prizes for the Games (optional)

9.     Activities/Games

Games:

This is my favourite part. Here are some games you will enjoy:

1. How I met the Bride: Ask everyone to give a brief introduction of themselves and how they met the bride.

2. How well do you know the Bride: Before the shower, make a list of different questions you would like the bride to answer. During the shower, get everyone to randomly pick a number and answer any question tied to that number. The bride then gives the correct answer to each question. You can place a little nice punishment for wrong answers (if you like) to add to the excitement.

3. Karaoke: Play a popular wedding/love song’s instrumental and have everyone sing a verse of the song till the end of the song. What makes this really hilarious is when people lip sync or sing off key.

4. Do as the Basket Says: Put together random naughty girly questions. Have everyone pass a basket around while music plays, wherever the basket stops, the person picks a question and acts the part. Remember the kind of questions you make depends on the personality of the bride.

5. Words of Wisdom: ask everyone to write an advice on how to make marriage last based on personal opinion or experiences.

6. Tissue Wedding Dress Competition: Get lots of tissue rolls together. Split the girls in groups and have each group design a dress on a member of the group. This should be timed, say 10minutes. The bride chooses the winner of the competition.

7. Male Stripper: this is the part that gets ladies screaming over the roof top. Get a guy that can strip and dance at the same time. Remember moderation is key and everyone’s definition of moderation differs. Again this depends on the personality of the bride.

8. Tell Us About the Groom: This a popular bridal shower game. Before the shower, have the groom fills a questionnaire about himself and his relationship with the bride; questions like how they met, he’s favourite food, colour etc. During the shower ask the bride those same questions and see if she gets them right.  For every one she fails, give her a nice little punishment.

9. Memory Game: Let everyone write an embarrassing or most memorable moment they had with the bride. When everyone is done, it should be placed together and given to the bride to read out loud.

10. 20 Reasons Why I love her: before the bridal shower, ask the groom to give 20 reasons why he fell in love with the bride. Write them on different piece of paper and fold each piece. Give each piece to everyone present, play some good music and ask the bride to dance for each person individually before it gets read.

11. What Will Your Fiancé Do?

Before the bridal shower, create questions about what the groom will do if he finds himself in a particular scenario and ask her those same questions during the shower to see if they have similar minds.

12. The Bride from Head to Toe

Immediately the bride arrives at the venue, after all the hugs and screams from seeing friends, the MC should whisk her away to a part of the venue where no one can see her. Then ask everyone to write down what she wore from head to toe in 2 minutes; this should be timed. Bring the bride back to the venue and read all the answers to her. The best description gets to take the very first pictures with the bride.  

13. Truth and Lies

Everyone says one truth and one lie about their experiences with the bride. Then you all scream out TRUTH if you think it is or LIES if you think it’s not.

14. Imitate the Bride

Give your best imitations about the bride. The idea is to make her laugh really hard. The bride then picks the person that made her laugh the most.

15. The Celeb Game

This is similar to the children game: I am something, I like to do this but not that, what am I?

But you turn it into the celeb game on a whole new level. Describe a celeb in the most detailed way possible and have everyone guess who you are.

For example:  I am someone, I like to take selfies of my butt for the world to see, I have a baby named after the directional indicator on maps that points upward and I am married to a guy bearing the name of the directional indicator that points to the left…..who am I?

I just made that up and I am sure you guessed right #winks#.

Finally, spending a lot of money on a shower doesn’t guarantee you having the best time ever. The whole idea is make the bride the center of attention, unite her with friends (old and new) and have a great time.

JUST ENJOY!

Classic Breakup Lines

The discussion of heartbreaks came up with friends and the famous phrases girls and guys use to say that they aren’t interested in a relationship anymore or found another.

These are the few I could compile:

Sorry for not keeping in touch.…been having personal issues lately. These issues might linger, so I don’t want to waste your time

My family does not support our relationship and I don't want to hurt them

I don’t deserve you

It’s not working, infact it won’t work

You are too young for me

Have you seen what your mates are capable of doing….if you can’t do them, then I can’t stay

He/She makes me happier than you do

I need to make myself a better one so I can become a better two

I want to have fun, am not ready to settle down, I still want to enjoy my youth, I don’t want to hold you down

I know your are ready for marriage, but I am not

I feel pressured to make a commitment and I am not ready

Age might not be on your side but it’s on mine, let’s move on with other people

I am just not ready for a relationship right now, but if I were... you'd be the One

It's me not you

I can’t see myself spending the rest of my life with you

I think we are better off as friends

You are too good for me

This break up will make us stronger and might bring us back together

I love you too much, it’s driving me crazy, and so I need to regain my sanity

You’re just too perfect for some else and I won’t treat you like you truly deserve

I don’t want to do this anymore

I need to meet other women so that I prove to myself that my love for you is real

I am going through mid-life crisis and I need to make some changes, and it includes you

I can’t deal with the long distance

I think you love me more than I love you

We are too alike, you know my every move,  it won’t work

I like you but I don’t love you

Feel free to share yours

Power Of Makeup

For me, the best part of being a makeup artist is seeing the joy that lights up the face of my client when they look in the mirror. That satisfaction keeps me going.

When I compare the gloomy faces of the ‘before’ pictures and the confidence that transforms the ‘after’ pictures, that is my true reward.

No matter how you look at it, makeup does a lot of magic after application on the face. In fact, I think it even goes psychological in some way. Once a beautiful face meets a camera, it's like the ultimate attraction, you can’t have a bad day flashing your teeth, pouting, flipping your head in several directions, striking the Angelina Jolie leg pose because your spirit is lifted and you feel/know that you are beautiful. I think I would say, makeup has its own healing properties.



That's how she feels about her MAC Ruby Woo Lipstick



The guys are not left out here as well. I remember a wedding makeover I did a while back; the groom insisted he must get his share of makeover for the white wedding, after he saw how beautiful his wife looked in their traditional wedding pictures. Also, to get the right effect on camera especially for music videos, runway shows, guys also wear some amount of makeup. Trust me; it has the same wow effect on guys too.

To be truly beautiful is to reach inside ‘YOU’, find ‘YOU’ and love ‘YOU’, all makeup does is power up that beauty to life and make your love your appearance even more.

 What’s your favorite thing about makeup? 

Help! I Feel Sucidal

An anonymous reader sent me this intriguing mail and with his permission, I decided to throw this open for advice.

I was only 8 years old when I lost my Dad, who was the family soul provider. So things became really tough and left my mum struggling to make ends meet. I remember how every other night, my mum would cry about how her life became empty without my dad and how she had to become the bread winner. We lived in a congested ‘self-contain’ where we depended solely on NEPA for power.  Usually, the heat was always so unbearable at night, so we would sleep without clothes.

As I grew older I became more conscious of my body, so I slept with at least my boxers. Severally, I caught my mum trying to pull off my boxers. She would insist the weather was too hot for me, but I would insist on being fine. She finally ran out of the heat excuse, so one night, she started crying about how I had been like her husband since my dad died, and how she just wanted to cuddle because she had a bad dream that made her miss my dad. I reluctantly cuddle her and that’s how the whole thing started.

That’s how I saw myself sleeping with my mum.

But everything had to change when I got married, I avoided being alone with her for 5 years. I have an amazing wife but we are yet to have kids.

Last month, my Mum’s doctor called saying she was sick. She knew how to draw sympathy to herself so well, that even my wife thought I was a heartless son. So I had no choice but to visit her. On getting to her place, to my greatest surprise, she was in her bedroom waiting provocatively dressed. Then I got mad and decided to leave, which resulted in her crying. She knew just how to get me emotionally sympathetic towards her. I broke down, we both cried and it happened again.

Today, my mum called saying she’s pregnant and the doctor says that abortion is not an option for her because of her age.

Today, I thought of committing suicide, please help me, what do I do?

Engagement Ring.....Mere Show off or Truly Significant?

So I was having this discussion about engagement rings with my friend and the whole paparazzi that goes with.

His argument was that these days, girls use it as a form of show off and guys have to go all the way in the name of impressing, some even go as far as using their life savings to buy an engagement ring and propose in the most romantic way that has never been done before in the history of fairy tale.

He kept laying emphasis on the fact that what pisses him off the most is the show off on bbm and social media with phrases like….Guess who’s off the market….ME! He proposed and I said Yes!  Here comes MRS …..! I am engaged! etc.

To his questions:  Why do ladies act utterly excited and surprised to know they are engaged, as if they didn’t know it will eventually happen? Why would you date and get all serious if it is not for the ultimate end called marriage? Why do the girls feel happier and display it more than the guys? Is it a guarantee that the wedding will eventually hold or that the marriage will last?

Do all guys feel this way too?

So my argument was this: If you have to impress your woman to buy her a ring then you guys are not being real to each other…..more like a ‘faketionship’ not a ‘relationship’. The engagement ring is a sign of commitment and love….and what really does matter and is most important in all of this is that you really feel that LOVE for each other that makes you want to make a commitment with a symbol….a ring.

With all of this, I decided to do a quick research on engagement rings. The origin of engagement ring dates back as far as ancient Rome. The position of the engagement ring was chosen as the ‘RING FINGER’ because it was believed that the ring finger was made up of a vein that connects to the heart. Well, since we profess love with phrases using the heart, I can understand the sense in it.

Cupid in Roman Mythology was the god of erotic love/attraction, signified by small winged boy, blindfolded, carrying bow and arrows. It was believed that cupid arrows had a tip of diamond, so in the Middle Age, diamond became significant for undying love. And that is actually why today most engagement rings have diamond stones.



Engagement Ring with Diamond Stones



Engagement Ring with Gem stone (Ruby)

So, yes, it is true that it is a borrowed western culture, but think about it…..What don’t we borrow from the western world? We literally borrow almost everything.….and really LIFE IS A BLEND OF DIFFERENT CULTURES.

#SO FAST FORWARD TO 21st CENTUARY#

These days’ diamond stones are now being replaced for gem stones depending on your taste and the significance of the gemstone to you. It’s all supposed to happen once in a life time (although these days marriages crash like pack of cards).

What is your opinion? Ladies/Guys help me out here…..the argument is still on.

The Art of Gele Tying

Imagine going for a wedding these days without seeing someone on 'GELE'…..that’s like saying the sun won’t rise right….IMPOSSIBLE.

Head-tie is popularly known as 'GELE' in Yoruba and 'ICHAFU' in Igbo.

For brides, asides the glam makeover, the head tie is one thing that complements your outfit on your traditional/engagement wedding day. Since the bride has to be the center of attention on her wedding day, getting the right head tie fabric/texture (not too hard or soft) and pattern (embroidery) is very important in delivering ‘an all heads turn around attention seeking’ gele. The design of the head-tie and the finishing in the tying makes you stand out.
I remember when Gele used be a thing for the Mamas and Grandmas, that’s like way old school now. These days babes are rocking it way better than the mamas….aso-ebi without gele is like plain rice without stew…..making it the fashion accessory of our time.



3-in-1 Igbo Head tie





Straw Head-tie



2-in-1 Aso Oke head-tie



2-in-1 Straw Head-tie



Net-Fabric Gele



The Classic Igbo Head-tie



Dissecting the Bag of a Female Hustler

#Alarm rings#….

Reach out….#Snooze for 5mins#

In my mind, it’s still a 5mins sleep.

#30mins mins later, alarm rings again#

Jumps out of bed……JESUS! I am late oooo #hoping for a miracle#

#break previous shower holding record#

Choi, I want to do matching bag and outfit today o…..no time #takes same bag as the day before#

The ‘Usain Bolting’ begins to beat traffic #cleans sweat#

#Life of a working female#

It’s a long weekend thanks to the weekend/public holiday #whoop whop#. The relief of not setting your alarm or snoozing it to get more sleep, all the hustle with traffic so bad that you fantasize about how you would beat it if you were Louis Lane (superman’s girlfriend) or had some kind of magical powers……ahhhh I know….RELIEF…..even if it’s for a short while. 

It’s a good time to settle down and rearrange your handbags and makeup purses.

Gross is the perfect word to describe the state of my mine. Every time I clean it, I am amazed at its content.

Why do I still have the receipts I used in the super market the other day? When did my kajal stain my purse so bad? How come I have a padlock in my bag?Where did all these papers come from?

#Now scanning my memory#

Nigeria Highway Code Book: I got it while trying to obtain the new drivers’ license.

Padlock: I locked my bag at the airport for fear of the JEWS a.k.a THE OWNERS

Receipt from Supermarket: Hmm, let’s just say it’s a slip of hand that I still have it  

Sanitizer: Ebola or no ebola, I carry it o….I can’t shout

Manicure set: I leave it in my bag to randomly clean my nails when I get bore

Perfume: To smell nice and fresh all the time or if I forget to spray before leaving the house for work

Papers and Pen: I like to write things down so I don’t forget

Earpiece: Music to my ears especially for the days traffic causes me to 'MOSES' as my fore fathers did or when the spirit leads me to burn calories

Money: iz ah necesari o #in wizkid's voice#

Comb: to the hair rescue any day, any time

3D glasses: hmmm this one I can’t remember o….choi who gave me o…..hmmm….ah ha Yemi gave me to watch movie ages ago. It became a bag accessory in a bid to cut cost, in case I branch to see a 3D movie after work, I will not buy or pay extra #teeth out# #ijebu tinz#

Sunscreen: for fear of getting roasted by the sun

Paloma: tissue for where there’s none #Life saver#

Atm Card: truth is, I don’t know why I still have this particular blue one:
1. It has no money 2. It has no money 3. I am serious, It has no money
So why do you have it?
Great Question
Answer: I really don't know

My wallet: It’s supposed to keep money, cards,  passports in an orderly manner.
Is it doing exactly that?
No….Why?  I hurriedly used the atm and threw the money straight into my bag not my wallet.

Makeup Purse: I can’t explain it’s condition….like an overloaded MOLUE. Been procrastinating on buying a new one

Medication
I had an allergy, so, I had to get the drug for it.
Do I still have the allergy? No…..Why is it still there? Still thinking…hmmm

Did I give you excuses for everything? I doubt it….The wonders of my bag/purse….time to clean it all up.

Am I the only one in this mess?
Can you relate?
PLEASE TELL ME THE CONDITION OF YOUR HAND BAG/MAKEUP PURSE  RIGHT NOW